Phone Stealer

Dear Miss Phone/Credit Card Stealer,
First I would just like to tell you how angry I am at you! Angry because you ruined my perfectly good day. I got to sleep in and even had time to go to the gym. Then I was going to go take a test, go to work for a few hours and then I had the rest of the day plotted out to get ahead on my homework because next week is jammed packed! Then you had to go an interrupt my workout by stealing my phone, ID and credit cards. Oh and thank you for making me bawl in front of ALL of the people at Gold's Gym. I can't imagine that your life is that hard that you have to steal from other people. Come on, you have a gym pass for pete's sake! Did you ever stop and think that I had to work my butt off for my money? Lets see you stole total about $500 from me. I earn about $8.50/hour after taxes. So that means it took almost 60 hours of working for me to earn that... Bet you didnt think about it that way... Stupid girl.
Oh and by the way, thanks for probably ruining my Book of Mormon midterm that I was supposed to take today. I have to take it tomorrow because its the last day. But I honestly doubt I will be able to do well because I can't concentrate. I swear if I get a bad grade and lose my scholarship... I will hunt you down... no joke.
However, I would like to thank you for being a ROYAL IDIOT. Obviously your first mistake was stealing from me. But secondly, stealing from a place that you have to log into??? THEY KNOW YOU WERE THERE!!!! We have your name and your picture! Its on a huge list, but if I have to I will see to it that every single girl on that list is talked to. Another reason you are an idiot is that you called people from my phone. Did you really think I wouldn't check my phone records? We have the numbers of four of your friends... and I promise that they will rat you out.
By the way, thanks for trying to use my card at a place that has security cameras. Yup that is right... we know what you look like now... AND I already talked to the cashier you tried to use my card on. She remembers you... Oh and by the way thanks for not being a blond haired, blue eyed white girl. That cuts out like 90% of the girls on the list. Finally one good thing has happened from to that fact that Utah is not diverse. Girl... I will find you... and I will not feel sorry when your record is screwed for the rest of your life.

Good luck finding a job with a record.... Idiot. Bet that money and iPhone won't be worth it in the end.

Kenna